Dear Viewer,

Due to our strong convictions and habitual practices, which at times may be viewed as arrogant, sexually obsessive disruptions on this otherwise informative super-highway, we would like to stress that in no way, shape or form, do we believe in the supernatural, nor have we ever participated in any type of malevolent cultural ideology.

No animals were harmed in the creation of this sentimental experiment, nor has it been the case that the side/front sections of anybody’s breasts and/or buttocks were published knowingly. And no, sadly, we cannot promise that no one’s feelings will get hurt.

Let this be a written apology in advance — a few words to help ease the pain of some impudent act we’re likely to commit in the near future. In the meantime, enjoy what we have to offer, and remember: tell all your friends.

Sincerely,

Jordan + Matt
Say Mayday
’The Best Website in the Whole World’